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Boredom,
Giftedness · Relationships · Love
Giftedness and romantic relationships
When intensity, a need for stimulation and feeling out of step enter a relationship
Romantic relationships can be very rich when one or both partners are gifted. They can also involve particular needs for stimulation, intensity, independence or mutual understanding.
Video in French. The article below is available in English.
10 common challenges in couples
When one or both partners are gifted, ten difficulties may be particularly common:
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Impatience,
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Emotional hypersensitivity,
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The perfectionism,
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The need to be right,
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The need to be alone,
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Isolation,
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Feeling uncomfortable in social situations,
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Multipotentiality,
Video in French. The article below is available in English.
Who is the ideal partner for a gifted person?
Ideally, their partner will have several of the following characteristics:
Intelligence at a similar level (ideally within 10 points of IQ and EQ),
Valuing the difference of their gifted partner,
Being independent, since codependency prevents a gifted person from fulfilling their mission,
Enjoying discovering and exploring the world and different ways of experiencing it,
Humour,
Being supportive,
Flexibility,
Having shared interests that allow fascinating intellectual exchanges.
Video in French. The article below is available in English.
HEP and love
In a relationship, a person with High Emotional Potential is not afraid to love; they are understanding and empathic; they find injustice difficult to tolerate; their feelings are often close to the surface; they are very intense and seek something absolute. They should avoid manipulators (particularly narcissistic manipulators) and can flourish with a partner who has High Intellectual Potential, High Emotional Potential or typical functioning, provided that their emotional intelligence is at a similar level and they value their many differences.
Frequently asked questions
What difficulties can be common in a relationship with a gifted person?
Boredom, impatience, heightened sensitivity, perfectionism, needing to be right, needing solitude, isolation, discomfort in certain social situations, multipotentiality and existential depression are among the difficulties described.
What kind of partner is especially well suited to a gifted person?
A partner with relatively similar cognitive and emotional intelligence, who values their difference, remains independent, curious, flexible and supportive, and shares some of their interests.
What distinctive features can shape the love life of someone with HEP?
A person with HEP may love very intensely, be highly empathic, find injustice difficult to tolerate and seek a relationship that values their differences and emotional intelligence.
Is your way of loving connected with your giftedness?
Screening can help you understand whether your relationship patterns are part of broader HIP or HEP functioning.
